[04]Picture, Perfect, Pathetic

So serenade her with your last pathetic suicide love song.

I don't think that "being myself" is a bad thing really... but... the fact that I'm not "Kitten" ... is my sin. I'm so torn in my emotions. Do you love me...? I feel as though I'm not perfect in your eyes anymore. You don't even tell me you love me anymore. You stopped, and it dwindles at me. There's a place that I've found as far as i can see and this place lies within the depths of my dreams. Where everything was perfect. It was all just a dream anyway right, where everything is so right and perfect or wrong and traumatizing. It'll never happen. Some things have happened and... what am I saying, it's all just a dream. A dream a missed memory, another something I wish to just make again. I'll never have this again. Is it even right to still say I think about you everyday, that I still love you and miss you?

[03]Oh, gently please. Won't you take your time on me?

Oh, gently, please. Stop talking about dying, like we haven't already tried it.

When I woke up, it was already Morning. What had happen back in July wasn't a dream. It wasn't... A dream... How imperative he is to me. It's pathetic to be smiling everyday, looking and being happy as much as I can be, and yet, when everyone's gone and asleep, it's 3am and I'm crying by myself. This Fantasy filled Reality Romance. It's over, it's completely, I just want everything to end, not just me. I've been so depressed and angry, over and over, it makes me sick and I cringe at every thought especially with the thoughts I type down in the start of numbering these blogs. At the very moment, you're screaming and crying leaving a vexation in everyone's mind glaring at the annoyance you are and they're always telling you, "It'll be okay, you'll feel better soon, everything will all blow over, you'll get over it." It isn't you in this position so what do you truly, honestly know? No one can get into my mind and comprehend and no one has really has the exact same emotional level I do. My heart was given back to me, I found what I lost and I'm not giving it to anyone or giving it back until I see this in the future. I feel to find out that it's too late to have my feelings show. After speaking with him that one day, I told him that I loved him very much, always have, forever and will stay, then he tells me to "prove it, if you truly love me, prove it" And reading that text made me think of his voice strongly in my head, it pierced through me... prove? Really? Do I have to work hard and prove my Love to you? MY LOVE. I've always loved you, that's never changed, I'm a little messed up right now but why do you have to make it seem like you doubt me, I'm the one doubting your love for me when you've got her name and the day you began a life of spending the rest of the days with her all over your arms. My heart's just locked and I hold the key, there's no spare. If anyone ever tried again, I'll throw my key in the ocean, see who takes enough courage and time to go swim the seven seas to look for this key just to unlock my feelings. There was so much unconditional love for you, so much care, time and effort, I put all of my energy into this relationship, I did so much work, and even with this stupid fucking distance, nothing was enough to keep you here with me. Let's go back, it was my fault saying I just wanted to be best friends, because I was hurt knowing you liked someone else, knowing you liked her, and I hate that, I hate everything. I truly envy you, I envy and adore you at the same time, I adore and envy the strength you have to not have these sorts of things to linger and hinder you from moving on. I can't do that, I just can't. You only like her don't you? Well I love you, you love me right? So why won't you be with me? Distance? Oh... that's right, this distance... You make me feel imperfect. You're on my mind every second of everyday, even now, and I'm crying, I'm crying so much, I can't fathom the words that mean how much expression in my feelings that I have for you. You're just number one to me and I'm just weak. I'm weak without you, you're touch, your affection. I can't fathom how much of a strong person you are to stand there quietly to see another human being die emotionally. I love you so much, I really do, I love you a lot, and I always will. I will and have kept my promises but I suppose this is just something with a great reason that you couldn't keep this time around...

I will always love you just couldn't last and you mean more than the world does to me, all fell short in one quick and easy drop. The relationship we have is so strange, seems vile but so very right. To go around everyday and people know "They're best friends, they've always been best friends" To go around with that smile everyday and tell people how much of a great person you are, especially to me, run around making sure you're alright, and people see how much damage I take from it all the time. From now on, no one will ever know that I am and was your ex, everyone will address me as that true best friend you claim me to be and hope you do. They will never know that you are my One True Love, one that I will never hold hands with, never get to kiss you many many times, never get to say 'I love you baby, good night and sweet dreams!' while your arm is around me lacing fingers with my other hand. I'll never get to wake up to your sweet face sleeping soundly, then waking up a few minutes after with your bright blue eyes. Never will for a very long time... and I'm dying, this is all killing me softly and too easily. My emotions are run down and I'm thinking too much. I love you and I always will, what more do I need to do or say to really prove that?

[02]Chase your Dreams

There's no time to Bleed

I regarded that the World is such a sad sight. Everyone is living in Fear, of the next person, the next event. I'm not afraid of this World... yes it's a scary thought but I stand. Lately just looking in the mirror makes me fall back into my memories. All the pain I had to endure.... all that pain, how much must I endure till I reached the breaking point. Did I even reach one at all? I've spoken to Mother Nature lately, and it seems as though the air that was just humid for the longest time today, came to a cool breeze, wrapped around me. It was enchanting, I was captured by it's rapture. I opened up my eyes today to the night sky and I looked closer to see little stars, there are more I know... bigger ones too. Little ones just want to shine. Stars, Stars, Stars. They're so enticing, Didn't I used to shine like that? I'm not falling into any place right now, I'm just emotionally tired... Yet I let this all keep going and going and going anyway. I'm stuck in July, back where I was truly entirely happy for once in the longest time. How I lust for him, his touch, his lips on mine, knowing he's smiling while we kissed. His arms around me were the only security I had, I miss every second of him near me. And I feel that nearly 90% of myself is gone, I feel transparent. We've fought and gotten into such frustrating situations for a while. I could have sworn I would have lost him for good. He's been down lately... and he's told me that I haven't been being a best friend. Now I have to prove to him that I love him dearly, forever and always and prove that I do care about him. Why must I work so hard to keep this together, I'm tired... I want to sleep but I don't, days I'll go without sleep for a few days, rest a few hours and be back to what I'm doing. Where would all this be without the feelings from me you drained out, and yet you can't explain what's going on. I feel that sometimes I'm breaking at the seams of my skin. My love for you is so unconditional. I truly do love you. I want to know what's wrong with you, you don't tell me as much on your mind as you used to. You really don't. Just please let me save you because nothing seems to be functioning right now. So here I go, take a breath, count to three, and jump into the still cold water where on the other side everything is cold and blue where I lay in that chill water floating, watching the little bubbles escape out of my mouth slowly, steadily, ready to drown but live forever. Did you ever think we would go this far and now put our back to another and walk away, no, I will not walk away, we haven't gone anywhere. I'm in a phase of remaking myself remember? This is a phase I've put myself into, A temporary shut down of my system. I feel my mind getting steady, my hands getting cold, my heart beat slowing, my eyes fading losing that shine of caramel brown everyone always saw the beauty of in me. People ask why I'm always smiling by myself in pictures. I guess I just like taking pictures of myself. I do smile with others though. People tell me how much of a great girl I am, how I'm wonderful and beautiful. Beautiful... hmm, wonderful? My looks weren't enough to keep him here.

[01]i've made my bed so i'll lie in it.

I've dug my grave so God help me die in it.

I've written continuously in this blog about my sad depressing and Heart trending thoughts and I cringe at the thoughts I've had and yet continued. I've looked on myself and I definitely hate who I am. I'm not me. I used to be a sweet girl, I never gave a damn of a word anyone said, and I was always walking with my head high. Rarely down and sad and always hyphy, full of energy all the time. Always on a natural high and laughing and smiling seemed like the greatest and best thing I knew how to do. What got the best of me, what happened? Why did I drop the crayons that I used to color my life and broke down in black and grey. I became a pessimistic, negative person. I used to be so adolescent, my innocence was purely gone... And it seems that I have changed for the worse. This me everyone sees is something weak, pathetic, vile disgusting display of affection that should be covered with dirt and snow. I've tried changing and I fail miserably. What I've come to fathom is that I gave into all my negative thoughts. The power of me died into depending on the boy I love. I put all my hope and strength in to him thinking he's the only support I'll ever need. And he still is, but I should and need to be strong even without it. I can't live without him though, I need him every day in my life and without him My heart can't function. But it seems that me and my ex are just nothing more but best friends now. And he tells me he still has feelings for me and I know I'm better than her. But I feel my hopes of being his number one have failed completely. I absolutely loathe her existence, I see nothing good of her, I'm jealous people may say but I just fucking hate her. Once seen as party matieral now seen as a way out of this misery. The sad part in all of this is i still crave that part in you that held me so close, that part i gave my heart out so willingly for you to scorch it. This time, everyone wants to say that he's wrong, he's done nothing but hurt me. But I will always take him back. I'll always say yes right away if he asked me back in his arms the way I want to be. And what if he wraps me in ribbons again and lets me go to unravel in an endless scary fall, I'll go back and forth, back and forth, up and down, just like a yoyo, back in his hands, free falling the next. He's seen the sadist in this relationship. He knows me better than anyone else does, better than I know myself. I've never lied about this, I still fucking love you.

tonight

I fucking hate myself.

I am losing my mind

And I can't stop crying
I'm so sick of myself.
How did I become this type of person.
This is sickening and disappointing.
- - -

Dear Mom
I'm sorry I'm not a perfect Daughter, I'm sorry I yelled at you and treated you like shit all the time, but I guess I just stuck with the golden rule of 'Treat others the way you wanted to be treated' and you know, when you yell at me and stuff, I'm gonna act the way I do. But I guess that's just pointless, you and Bam both. Closest to family I have left but I'm just sorry. I should just be a normal daughter, work hard in school, keep my grades up and get into as much trouble as i can and want without getting caught, heh. But i still don't enjoy the rest of the family

Lindsey,
You're an amazing girl, I'm sorry I don't tell you enough of my Life or my problems, but i'm seriously sick of telling you what's wrong with me every day, I rather just talk. I love you. You're sweet, smart, and so funny. I can't wait to see you one day. I can't wait to do all the things we said we would one day. I can't wait to share moments with you. You're the reason why I drop the drugs down and move on for the better. Because you've been straight up with me, you've pushed me down, looked at me and made sure I got up on my own with no help or support with other things, because you know i can be strong, and you're my inspiration and a big part of my life i don't want to lose. you have no idea how much you mean to me. you seriously are something else and i enjoy and love every minute of it

Dylon,
Honestly, I hate your girlfriend, i hate all the girls you at one point like or went out with and i found them all out. I love you more than anything or anyone. I'm sorry I've been 'flirtatious' and totally unappealing mentally, emotionally and physically to your eyes. I don't know what it is, I guess I seek the physical attention that I want from a guy, and when I'm held by a guy I only think of you. It's sad that I'm calling every one of my friends by your name and they get mad at me for it hehe. I do cry every night, wishing that i can be in your arms again. i wish i were back in july. i wish these stupid little things that set off all my problems never started. i love you, i do. i want you back, i miss your kisses, your hugs, your cuddles, your ability to make me smile... i want you back. this is killing me...

i'm freaking out

I don't wanna go out with Wayne.
just, what the fuck
im not thinking
i need to think
think
think
think

I'm losing my mind.

You've got the strangest way of showing me you care...

Did I really like Romario enough to cry over this him? I found out he went out with Kaitlyn. And for some reason, I don't think he really wants her like that. Deandre [spelling?] was talking to me during Pep rally today. He told me that Romario still really loves me, and that he didn't want anything to happen if we were to be in a relationship for a while. It confused me. He pushed me away on purpose so that I could get mad enough to get over him... Yet this entire time with him not looking my way or attacking me from behind giving me a hug, I realized I've been so angry at him for too much. After Deandre told me this, I looked at Romario and he looked back at me. And for a few split seconds, he looked down as if he pretended he wasn't trying to catch my glimpse.

Told me Romario had much love and respect for me, he doesn't want anything happening to me.
Yet he hurt me, do guys always like to do that to me? Hurt me to save me?
People have a weird way of showing they care

This is sickening

i hate her, i hate her.
he's so happy with her.
and i hate it.

i feel like i've done nothing, i hate her
i hope the worst for her.
but that would only make dylon upset.

pain killers pain killers pain killers...

So he told me to back off

Friday- Had a football game, our school won, and it was sick. I met another member of our Phantom Crew, his name's Kory and he jerk kicked me in the head and I got knocked out for a few minutes. I was dancing around and recording stuff. After a while of running around and literally all the guys fighting over me, it was all funny. When they were fighting, Romario just took me and was like: "You niggas are dumbasses you fightin' over the lady and all I gotta do is get at her like so" It was a fun fun night. But near the end, Romario asked me 'What if I get a girlfriend?'
I told him I backed off for good. So after the game we talked, I told him that I know I've been clingy, do you want me to back off. And he bluntly said 'Yeah you should' and nodded his head. After we didn't talk, I just walked away, called my mom and I was gone.

No it doesn't hurt me, I truly don't care, Romario's just a friend and if he misses me he'll hurt himself, I'm too grown for that.

Saturday - Part 1 of my sister's wedding, went to the temple, spent time, yadiyada, Sammi came over to sleep over. Me her and Nikki went looking for a dress for nikki. Nikki has this really pretty teal dress, I absolutely love it. :) And I was just vibing with my ipod....

Sunday - My sister's big day, it was all sorts of great and fucking messed up. I wasn't included in the wedding.
The guy was talking about the family and how great we are and such, saying we've done so much for everyone whose in the room now. They said every family member's name but mine and my brother whose in Thailand. My mom and dad and my brother in The Marines, Benny was said. And I was suppose to escort my sister into the room. but no. I wasn't. I sat there with Nikki and Sammi and I wanted to fucking cry. I was too busy laughing like a maniac, making all that stupid shit a big joke, and Sammi knew exactly how much I wanted to cry... But only one little girl. Me and Dylon's "daughter" ♥ I was so happy.

Now i'm packing for Disney... ByeBloggy.

Well hey, whatever makes you fall asleep at night

I miss Dylon. Everything about him, I miss him. I sort of sound old saying this but I really love how I watched this kid grow the past two years, he's such a man.

I don't know what's going on now though, Romario's scared to commit into a relationship, so... I don't know we're pretty much acting like we're going out again.

Eh, it's pretty much over i know it.

The city looks so pretty

Do you want to burn it with me?

- - -

Today's the 15th, I remember the month anniversaries me and you had
But ever since May when we stopped it, I always seem to look at the date seeing it's the 15th.
And I just ... sort of reminisce everything.

The other day when I was at the airport picking up my grandparents I was in the same exact spot where I met Dylon. How i turned around and ran into his arms. I re-traced my steps so well. I remember where Abby walked, Dylon, going to get his luggage. and then.... just being with him. I held his hand for the first time. I felt so complete. After opening my eyes to the late night time of the airport then, I felt the date and time was all wrong, I felt like I was picked up in the midst of July and put in October for no reason. I wanted to scream saying that the date and time is all wrong, it's July, July 21st, it's the afternoon, it's 1:03pm, you're WRONG.
But no.. It was October. Early October.

I felt awkward, itching to break out of my body because I felt myself being stuck in July. Stuck back where I found my true happiness. I wanted to cry horribly. Just that one spot where I retraced my happy steps so perfectly, I saw his figure standing there, and when i reached out my hand his hazy figure disappeared... Dylon still lingers here, it tells me he was happy and he had a lot of fun.

After that I just looked around the empty luggage pick-up terminal. No one was there it was 8 at night and my mom and sister were yelling at me to leave so we can get in the car. I walked out and when the doors slid open, I could have sworn I felt his arms around my waist and that's when I let my tears fall but not enough to let my grandparents or anyone see.

Unfinished lyrics...

You wanted me to be your ex chick
Well So called 'Baby' - I found the Exit
That's it, that's right, I'm dice with it, Fuck this
I'm flyin' solo, I'm straight without this, Oh and just so you know
You were just a creep - Steppin' all over my heart
But Hey, you maybe a good dancer sweetie
But i'll take a 2-step and [Hah] break dance all over your heart

And I will sing the Requiem

No one will ever accept you like I do.

And at your funeral I will sing the requiem

A comfort for you tonight...

Oh yeah, I'm writing on the RIGHT side...
Things have gotten so much better. I'm happy, entirely happy.
I've got my best friend, Dylon, we're on good terms right now and we're working
on the best of it. He's going out with Emily but I don't mind. :)
Me and Amber are talking a little bit again, all is good.
And I have a new boyfriend. And for my first time, he's Jamaican. Haha, I know what you're thinking
Stop thinking it.

He asked me out today, it was adorable. We're getting strange treatment from all the kids though. Because seriously, stereotypical wise, how often do you see a Jamaican Football Player with an Asian "scene kid" It's gonna be a while... Oh well. Haha.
I was all shy and girly girly out of no where today, we cuddled all day in class and such. oh boy
:P

Still waiting to see if i can go to Cali, i don't cause I wanna be with Romario and Nikki
and Sammi and Abby but i wanna see my brother and I wanna get out of florida for a bit.
Bye Bloggy.♥

With Every Heart Trending Teen

Written by Napelah K. Mingchai aka Kitten Kay Teacup.

Your sixteen years dead
With every fucking teen who wanted a better life
Authority can't control us, Fuck you we have our rights!

We walk with gravity on our shoulders, we're the dead of the night
Mother, Father are you afraid, or happy you're daughter is so perfect [ PSYCHE.]
We all carry these things inside that no one can see
And if they were told, you couldn't accept us, YOU REJECT US
Tie these heavy stones at our feet and throw us out in the deep sea

[Chorus] You run me down into a perfect Circle
Quit creeping on the words that I say, I've got more to tell
Your better off dead Quit creeping all the words that i said
Sixteen Years Young, Honey you're better off Dead

Well Darling I hope you understand, I'll love you more till my heart is black and blue
Wanna take a trip with me, let's get out of here,
These sweet whispers are nothing when you're lying in my bed
You think I require your submission
You think I like the way you taste, humiliation

This is my last chance to ask for permission
This fuckin' condition can't be cured or fixed with any prescription
Don't hold on to me with your sick obsession
Please release me before breaking, I'M NOT YOUR POSSESSION

[Chorus] You run me down into a perfect Circle
Quit creeping on the words that I say, I've got more to tell
Your better off dead Quit creeping all the words that i said
Sixteen Years Young, Honey you're better off Dead

I should have known better to see the mask of your eyes
The stab of your unsterilized knife and your sickening glare was my demise
I feel the love, the hate, the pain in my veins
My heart swells with hatred in your name

These Hearts, These Hearts
Look at you with your Teenage Heart on
These Hearts, These Hearts
Look at you with your white laced bra on
These Hearts, These Hearts
Honey you're cheap and disturbing, shut the fuck up you're nothing more
These Hearts, These Hearts
Go fuck yourself you fucking whore

[Chorus] You run me down into a perfect Circle
Quit creeping on the words that I say, I've got more to tell
Your better off dead Quit creeping all the words that i said
Sixteen Years Young, Honey you're better off Dead

Let me say it one more time, I SAID:
Your better off dead Quit creeping all the words that i said
Sixteen Years Young, Honey you're better off Dead

So he's finally with her.

I'll be just fine.

Suddenly...

I have a lot of hope for being with Dylon in the future, I hate how I can be so bipolar about this. Like I said, I still love him, I always will, more than anyone ever could, and I'm always going to be here and there for him. I'm Happy if he's happy right...? He's happy, right? I wonder if he'd tell me, he's always telling me he's just in a good or decent mood, the last time I truly say happiness was when I was with him back in July. Man I wish i were back in July. I'd live our days forever...

Well, I have a story to share, it's a dream I had last night, but I'll post it tomorrow. But tonight I wanted to post my thoughts of a broken heart. Since I can't stop crying about this at all.

A broken heart is forcing yourself to hang up the phone after you have dialed the first three digits to his phone number. A broken heart is the cold, shattering feeling you receive when you hear his name. A broken heart is when you are crying yourself to sleep every night and yet crying more and more each morning. A broken heart is glancing at his pictures, and then quickly turning your attention to something else to avoid your tears. A broken heart is screaming and begging for a second chance inside, but not being able to say it out loud. A broken heart is the emptiness and heart wrenching feeling you encounter when you see that he is talking to other girls. A broken heart is knowing that no matter what you do or say to yourself, you can't fool your heart into believing that you will in fact be “okay”. A broken heart is listening to that one song that makes you break down, on repeat. A broken heart is when you go from smiling uncontrollably every time you hear his voice to quiet tears for everyday that goes by without a word from him. A broken heart is when you try to ignore him but end up going out of your way just to see if you are on his mind. A broken heart is when you know you’ve been hurt, but have no idea how to fix it. A broken heart is when you finally realize that he’s everything you need… and at the same time realize he’s the one thing you can never have. A broken heart is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken then to hurt yourself trying to fix it.

i'm so over this

Recovering and still going strong
Azuren's right, I am a trooper. Aha.

Well, I'm strongly letting go of Dylon, obviously yeah I still love him, but I think I'm actually done.
I'll be seeing him in the future anyways, whatever we do. I love a boy who doesn't love me, and a true best friend I can't live without.

IDGAF;) Next Chapter.

I'm doing just fine

I'll rebuild myself.

I may look happy, but honestly dear, the only way I'll really smile is if you cut me ear to ear

This is my only mistake
I loved you

A broken dream, a fairytale
What I thought I believed in
Never again.

It is all my fault...

I'm so stupid, I'm so fucking stupid, I should have never told him I wanted to just be complete friends.
What have I done. Now he's gonna leave me for good. She's better than me isn't she?
Isn't she, she's better than me. Two years ago my heart was taken by him. Just two years ago.

The hardest thing anyone could ever take from me was my Heart, and he did.
Now it's so hard to accept it back in the condition it's in.

I want my Daddy. I want to be with my Dad. I want him here. I'll remember those words. She's first now. And I'll be last to best. I'm glad I'm barely remembering some stuff now.

God I just wanna dig her grave and push her in it.

What am I going to do?

I want to run away to Lindsey's house. Run away and just sit there in her room. Draw or something, just be hugged by her. Held. For God knows what, she takes all my problems and it doesn't even matter if I tell her all the things that go on every week. I just WANT to talk to her. I don't care. I want to talk to her. Hear her talking to me, See her iming me on MSN. I just want her words being said to me. That's all I really want. Not dump my problems on her. Maybe not even now because I know I can tell her anything and everything without being thrown around.

I'm not sure what I'm going to do.... I'm going crazy. I'm still in love with Dylon. And I only like Matthias. This is getting difficult because he's too in love with me. It's a little hard for me to take control of. And every time I tell him that I can't do this and I'm not ready for another boy in a relationship or liking anyone... He still shows his love to me like he's crazy. Like he can't live without me. And it's only been a week. How do I, we, him, how did this all even get attached. I can't do this I can't. I can't like him.

I want Dylon to give me another chance. Just be strong again to be back in the position of being his. Why does it have to hurt me... Why does he have to hurt me... I wanna know if he ever talks bad about me sometimes. Honestly yeah I am his best friend, and to him he says I am. But with all his ex's he's said a bunch of bad stuff about them. If it comes to anyone else or the girl he likes... Does he tell her I'm 'annoying' too...?
I want to run to Dylon too. Run through his door, find him on the computer or laying on his bed and just fall into his arms.

... Do i deserve this?

Our Memories

I'll admit to you my darling,
You were the cutest thing
I've ever laid eyes on my baby

You had me at Hello
Oh darling how I'd much rather be
There than here without you

A few months went by
It was amazing how perfect we were
All endless smiles and laughter

We've had so many good times
More than anyone, on this Earth
I love you more than the world does to me

Times get hard and we have many struggles
But my darling, I'd never give you up
I don't think I can live without you
And If I can, well baby I'm not about to

You're a thousand miles away
But it's worth a drive for a day to get in your arms baby
The stars might think we're silly
But I know they're just proud to see two kids in love

I'll wait for your next phone call
ask me how i am
i'm just fine, but i'm not okay

Quick post this morning... 5:44am.

I don't know what happened last night. I started getting really entirely dizzy last night. I don't remember when either.
The last thing I remember was the room tried to spin and I tried to capture my balance, confused trying to figure out what was going on with my mind.

I thought it was just a little mishap. I took a drink of my water, and I suddenly felt way too light. The last was something falling and breaking, and my head hurt really bad and I was knocked out.

My brother in law found me as it is, The glass next to me was poured and broken against my desk. My head hurt really really really bad, it still does, there's a huge bump there and it's pounding...
I just got knocked out. And I hit my head on the desk if this all makes sense I guess.

I'll have to admit, before all this I was crying. Crying like I never wanted to cry. cried because of unrequited love. Cried because I can't be in love. Cried because... I feel i've lost everything when it's all right there. I just can't do this, not right now.

My body is so cold. My brother in law didn't tell anyone, I told him not to, he came to wake me up and also check up on me this morning and told me what had happened. I was shocked to find myself in bed because I thought things were a dream but waking up to the pain in my neck and head made me realize something bad had happened. I saw all the text and im's dylon and matt sent me. Matt was entirely highly worried. Dylon is just mad... that i didn't answer him. He probably thinks i purposely ignored him.

I'm horrible, I thought I had this over with. I'm so stupid.