Suddenly...

I have a lot of hope for being with Dylon in the future, I hate how I can be so bipolar about this. Like I said, I still love him, I always will, more than anyone ever could, and I'm always going to be here and there for him. I'm Happy if he's happy right...? He's happy, right? I wonder if he'd tell me, he's always telling me he's just in a good or decent mood, the last time I truly say happiness was when I was with him back in July. Man I wish i were back in July. I'd live our days forever...

Well, I have a story to share, it's a dream I had last night, but I'll post it tomorrow. But tonight I wanted to post my thoughts of a broken heart. Since I can't stop crying about this at all.

A broken heart is forcing yourself to hang up the phone after you have dialed the first three digits to his phone number. A broken heart is the cold, shattering feeling you receive when you hear his name. A broken heart is when you are crying yourself to sleep every night and yet crying more and more each morning. A broken heart is glancing at his pictures, and then quickly turning your attention to something else to avoid your tears. A broken heart is screaming and begging for a second chance inside, but not being able to say it out loud. A broken heart is the emptiness and heart wrenching feeling you encounter when you see that he is talking to other girls. A broken heart is knowing that no matter what you do or say to yourself, you can't fool your heart into believing that you will in fact be “okay”. A broken heart is listening to that one song that makes you break down, on repeat. A broken heart is when you go from smiling uncontrollably every time you hear his voice to quiet tears for everyday that goes by without a word from him. A broken heart is when you try to ignore him but end up going out of your way just to see if you are on his mind. A broken heart is when you know you’ve been hurt, but have no idea how to fix it. A broken heart is when you finally realize that he’s everything you need… and at the same time realize he’s the one thing you can never have. A broken heart is like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken then to hurt yourself trying to fix it.