[07]Colour my World

Little girl, pick up your broken crayons
They've still got colour so continue to draw

Remember how I said before I was sick of the way I wrote my depressive heart trending thoughts? Cringing at the sick thoughts I had, moments where I almost cried, I understand myself more when I write my blogs, I hate writing though because I cry writing down every little detail of my thoughts. More of my ex because he was my world. You were this world I wanted to live in but slowly turned into a poison greater than cancer. Your name written through my heart, my head, my eyes my lips, everything. Now I stop sounding like I blame you though. You're in my life everyday, and though we haven't exchanged words much lately, you still make me smile. You still are the biggest part of my Heart. My true best friend, my true lover and only person who knows me inside out, back of their hand and knows me better than I know myself. I was running around in circles constantly hurting myself by everything, and I still do, but instead of falling to my knees to cry and hold myself in the agony of how much pain the infliction put in me I can bandage myself and keep walking, break a hole in the wall and walk my way. No more going through the same thing. Many people hurt me everyday let it be the smallest or biggest thing, But I allow certain people in my life, the people in my life that are worth suffering for. This is the last of my blog about what I've gone though, it wasn't very long that I started this but it helped me each time, I'm not sure if I will ever continue with a [08] who knows, but right now this is my last. I hope to have you in my Life forever, we'll go to Cali one day and party all night and sleep on the beach. We'll go shopping and try on all the sunglasses and funny clothing and take millions of photos. No matter what happens in the future I love you. I don't need to prove that to you, ever, you should know that. I won't need to doubt your love for me anymore, I honestly don't even mind if you fall out of love with me, nearly all of my heart may be black and blue but with a smile that I mean I don't mind, I'm strong remember? I'm stronger now. I refuse to fall back. I refuse to be kept down by gravity. You are what keeps me going, be happy, stay strong, we'll burn these cities down for what they've done to us one day. I love you, stay bright my little firefly.