It's depressing.

I'm so homesick that when I woke up from sleeping in Amber's room the night before, I looked up to my window and actually thought it was mine, rolling over I closed my eyes with a faint smile and I was missing 2 things. 1 - I wasn't at home, I'm still in Georgia for the end of this week. Then North Carolina Saturday Aug 15th.
Then it's just one more week and I'm home...
And 2 - Dylon wasn't near me, I miss him cuddling close to me, and he would wrap his arm around me, and even though a bit unconscious he would hold on to my back. Like as if he'd never let go. I miss how he's always awake first or he would immediately wake and he would trace his fingers up and down slowly from my entire side, or from my hip bones and up. I miss his warm touch and his soft lips.

I broke down badly last night, I was already feeling bad and Stephen and his dad were fighting, and I'm guessing most likely Stephen, shut the door on me when I tried to say something for mom's sake. I was trying to call Dylon but he didn't pick up, instead he ignored my calls, I texted him to pick up and that I really needed him. He asks me what's wrong by text, told me his phone was dying, and it made me even more mad in a splur of the moment that he wouldn't take his phone on it's last line to call me. But it didn't matter, I was already too upset, I told him, fine, never mind, forget it. And after I called Abby...

And she was the only comfort I had all night, and I didn't want to be near, or talk to anybody, so i slept in the other room, all by myself, alone, while on the phone with Abby.
Turns out they both don't want me in Georgia, I've never felt so wrong being in this family, I've never felt so far being near Amber and Nikki.

I can't wait to be in Dylon's arms more, and me him and Abby can be a family again. I guess this is my path, since me Amber and Nikki are all going down our own roads, still close to heart and memory, but making our own lives. It's sort of scary, what will happen to us?