What if I wanted to fight, beg for the rest of my life?

I've come to a great conclusion that I am no more, no way, absolutely phased by the break up of me and Dylon. And I might not know how to explain this but I love him that's one, I always will, at least for the longest time, but... I don't feel so clingy anymore, I'm not so desperate giddy begging and praying for him to call me so I can hear his voice, legit, we haven't talked on the phone to have a conversation for 2-3 weeks. He can't find his charger to his phone and that's fine, but even in the day time, there's just no way. But he's busy and stuff, he's got better things to do than talk to me, and strangely enough, I'm fine with it, is that even okay?

Am I a bad person?

And right now I'm happy, I'm happy with things, content really, I'm content with what I have, greatful. I am having my moments and stuff but I'm not going to be down and mad all the time, that's pointless.

But I do feel ugly, I wish I could be prettier, thinner, in a sense in which I want to feel prettier and thinner. I don't and am not like every other girl forcing themselves, I'm working my way up and by then I'll feel like a million dollar prize.